Part of it, I'm sure, is that living abroad, I walked a lot more, for example, and the local food was usually healthier. I was also just happier to be traveling and having adventures, I think, so there was far less unconscious stress-eating to fill up some void in my life; I was where I actually wanted to be, doing what I actually wanted to do, in other words, instead of what I'd been told I should be wanting or doing, so there was far less need to expend energy convincing myself otherwise. That is, my weight was its healthiest precisely during those exciting times in my life when I was thinking about it least. Health, I've come to suspect, is far less a matter of self-management than it of lifestyle.
I was reminded of this pet theory of mine last week, when I revisited the island of Puerto Rico for the first time in too long. I went with my girlfriend, and what was both of our surprises but that, well, we were hardly ever hungry! Like, we were seriously eating only once a day! And not because we were short on cash or budgeting or anything, but because we honestly weren't that hungry! And our meals weren't even that big--a couple pinchos, maybe splitting a pina colada. We were eating only when we needed, and stopped when we were full. It was a revelation of sort.
Who knows, maybe it was just because, lounging all day at the beach, one doesn't expend all that many calories. But I suspect that something more profound was going on here: we were where we actually wanted to be. We were actually enjoying our lives for a change. We were actually relaxing. This need to consume ginormous calorie intakes in order to prove to ourselves our existence and self-worth (ironically) simply was non-existant. I further stand by this theory because I've found that, now that I'm back in Iowa City, my appetite has returned.
Sometimes it helps to listen to your body--and if you're body is telling you to eat more and more, that possibly is a sign that all is not right with your life. That seems to make sense: in times of famine or war or other catastrophes, your body perhaps signals to you to consume as many extraneous calories as possible, so as to be able to navigate the coming troubles. Large appetites, then, are perhaps a sign that your body recognizes that something is seriously wrong.
Now, in modern America, we don't have nearly the same sorts of existential crises going on--but our bodies can still tell when something is wrong! And perhaps they are no longer what you expect: having a well-paying job seems like a great thing to have, particularly in this economy--except when it's a job you don't enjoy, or one that corrodes your soul, no matter how you try to convince yourself. So you're body instinctively boosts the appetite, to compensate. Maybe you live in a geographic area that is considered very prestigious or important, so everyone keeps telling you, and so you keep reminding yourself--but your body is not fooled, and thus before you know it you're calorie counting to try and off-set your expanding appetite.
So maybe if you find yourself packing on the pounds and gaining weight, the real take-away here is that it's not your mere eating habits or exercise habits that need to change, no--it's that your entire lifestyle needs to change! Your soul inhabits your body, the two are not separated; so if your soul feels empty and aches out for something more, your body will respond in kind. This sort of drastic change requires more than mere dieting--this perhaps means changing careers, or moving cross-country--or cross-planetary--or moving entire income brackets, or fundamentally altering your entire life philosophy to something the rest of society thinks is bonkers. But it also just might be worth it--far more than your weight is at stake here.
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